A Call From Japan Man

A Call From Japan Man 04/04/2005 « prev 1st rand curr next »

Riddle: What's the difference between John Wayne Gacy and Santa Claus? A: John Wayne Gacy will stop at nothing to kill you.

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I have to try sit-down peeing side saddle now.

Shouting 'yeah man! we doin' this!'? Hell yes.

Odds are there's a Heche en Mehico sticker on the side of that camera.

... mehico?

Like Speedy Gonzales likes to say. I theenk.

It's hard to aim.

How could aiming even come into it when toilet-bowl is over 50% of the urethra's surrounding world, and the >50% favoured by gravity for that matter?

<3.

for a second i thought you said "flavored" by gravity. This made the comment even better.

it does evoke such as a malt beverage yes

Don't let your pepper touch the rim.

I think it would almost guarantee pepper-rim contact.

Ray Smuckles: Trustbuster

I love that the digital camera also managed to capture what he was saying when the photo was taken.

It was hecho en mexico.

It's Yoshitaka Amano's concept art for Final Fantasy 6. Locke.

NEEEEERRDS!

I am surprised that this comment has garned no lames for fangirlism over a pretty boy J-pop singer. Is Assetbar becoming more open minded?

Well, Ray is a character in a comic strip. For all we know, his words just appear in text balloons that float above his head as he speaks.

You suppose that means you could pluck them out of the air and smack someone with 'em?

Yes, but it's generally considered bad form.

Your avatar makes it seem as if you're FAQ Ray, the administrator of Achewood Did You Know? Question Answering Service, popping in to clear up any ambiguities.

This was done in Who Censored Roger Rabbit, I believe, which was one of 2 or 3 books that the movie was based on.

Thank you for inadvertently telling me where Roger Rabbit originated

Yeah, I haven't gotten to read them yet, but apparently they were comic strip characters instead of animated, and lots more violence, swearing and death than you would think from the PG (although increasingly censored) film.

Such shenanigans were pulled in the old and venerable comic Pogo.

i love that ray slurps his martini with his tongue.

Well he is a cat, dude.

I think he's just trying to get the residue because he finished it all.

I always just assumed that Little Nephew was taking a video on the camera.

I came back to this strip the other day and realized that and was all "whoa I bet no one even thought of that!" and then I saw you had. A year ago.

So basically this chubby is because I have been outclassed on this one and I damn well know it.

I quote the alt text all the time.

The gong! The fake accent! The "did we party?"! There is so much to love.

Alt text: "Riddle: What's the difference between John Wayne Gacy and Santa Claus? A: John Wayne Gacy will stop at nothing to kill you."

...He took off all their clothes for them
He put a cloth on their lips
Quiet hands, quiet kiss
On the mouth...

lots of times when i hit the 'oh my god are you one of them' part of that song, i can't help but laugh at how silly and nonsensical sufjan can sound sometimes. that is not a very good song to laugh about, though.

And in my best behaviour
I am really just like him
Look underneath the floorboards
For the secrets I have hid.

*Intake of breath*

*Intake of breath*

Creepy.

I came back to this strip today to make a joke (of the form "what's the difference between A and B? A stop at nothing to kill you"). I look at the alt text, have a chuckle, then realize...

...my iTunes is PLAYING THIS SONG. Freaky as hell.

Yeah I mean if you are seriously listening to that song you can really work up to a good cry or desperate late-night phone call to your mother.

"Mom, I did it again..."

"M-Mom? Mommy? I made a really bad decision..."

Best. Alt-text. Ever.

It is, both very funny and deliciously dark.

he will even give you presents for being good. It's just that the presents might contain hazardous materials...like...a lion.

"They are otherwise, in all respects, one and the same."

Santa will try to kill you, but stop after the initial rage has subsided.

Like many Irish households, we leave alcohol and biscuits out for Santa.

It's pure coincidence that he visits England right after Ireland.

Im totally saying this next time I pee

Somehow it never occurred to me that Little Nephew probably does want to eliminate Ray as a competitor for selling weed.

Yeah, my first thoughts when seeing this strip were that Little Nephew is just playing a cruel prank on Ray, but then I went back and remembered the strip where he sells pot to T�odor with an elaborate code.

Yep, LN's blog confirms that he was using the Japan Man ruse to eliminate his uncle's competition.

I can only imagine what would happen if you try to step up on Santa's game.

Little Nephew would later sell the gong to Ray on eBay, claiming it was the same one Dennis Quaid punched in Rush Hour 2.

Quaid wasn't even IN Rush Hour 2.

I'm the This Is The Strip That Made Me An Achewood Fan guy for this one

I like how Ray threatens an allegedly Japanese man attempting to squelch his illegal drug business with the reminder that monopolies are illegal in America.

When Ray says "illegal," he basically means that it will not fly with the hip, modern, source-conscious pot clientele of today.

Lyle and Ray's perfect Jays are targeted at politically-aware stoners who prefer their illegal drugs to be locally sourced and organically grown, with a small carbon footprint.

So, hippies?

Bennington students/Vermont residents.

[/selfburn]

In Japan, they call him Annual Gift Man and he lives on the moon.

You're quoting the Simpsons but you're also quoting John Waters ... I don't know what to think.

But what do they call Santa?

This was the first Achewood strip I ever saw. At first I just got the impression that Ray was some fat rich guy being a dick and hanging around in a tracksuit, drinking a martini and talking about partying and business with people, just some complete walking shit. I wanted nothing to do with this shitty character or his retarded comic.

Then I got to the side-saddle peeing business. And I fell in love forever.

It is indeed a powerful tableau.

That seems like more than a small difference, unless you're talking about really just incredibly terrible kids.

Santa puts your presents in his sack, John Wayne Gacy puts you in his sack. Both sacks are wicked.

Weekend Blogs

Ray: No luck with the gardener lady.
Pat: I'm back.
Philippe: Hosey the Flow Cow!

rays blog is especially hilarious today

Man. That riddle. Blows the mind, no?

[IMGS OFF]
maybe there is no difference between santa claus and japan man

"I'm gonna shove coal so far up your stocking you'll be coughing up diamonds!"

I love that Ray's first instinct is that he probably had a party with Japan Man.

I loved this strip more before I got to the panel revealing Japan Man as that little hosebeast.

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