Why is everyone else going there? I want to! :(

Wow, I was thinking this strip was just so-so but reading it backwards it is clearly awesome.

I... I need to go think about things.

See, when the above comments got made, at first I was like "em morf yawa teG .seman tiurf! haHA I'm so trendy that I understand how hilarious this comic is backwards! Heh heh. Myes."
Then I scrolled down to your comment and said "ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Yes that is actually very funny."

I am not going to brave the failure of posting a link, but the strip wherein Blister fixes Todd's van also reads well enough backwards.

Man, that song was completely in my head when I woke up this morning. CREEPY.

Cousinted, you are just full of barely-relevant references which none the less make me happy.

Feebl, Beef.

Ya, Ray!

(do not chubby me those were *awful*)

Chubbied because i just bought a book that contains your avatar. You are obviously a man with taste.

also it's hang a salami, unless this was somehow intentional.

Nope, I'm a moron.

No sir, away, a papaya war is on!
Sun at noon, tan us.

Obviously you didn't read the book that his sausage ref came from, from the author of Sit on a Potato Pan, Otis.

I'd link to Amazon, but I'm sure Asset Bar would implode or something. Blame Cousinted, which by al that is holy I can't turn into a palindrome.

Nor spell 'all', apparently.

Are you referring to the Ouroboros, perhaps?

Sometimes people just say "bullshit" after thinking of things they don't care for, I guess.

Yeah, but... Does Ray?
Actually, he seems exactly the kind of guy to do just that, now that I think of it.

I mean, we all do it, right? Heh heh, right guys?

YES.

Applesauce!

yes this is how i assumed everybody read it backwards until they got all angry nuts about reading it backwards-forwards-backwards.

Bullshit.

Nonsense!

someone help me out here...as i type this, the only person to chubby idsyen's comment above this one left by a very dapper man in a gas mask is myself. why hasn't Philippe's rad exclamation not been as loved as the one from such as a movie? i do not Get it.

To be honest, it was late and I was tired. My quip was in dull humor and uncouth. I ain't proud of what I done.

but then again we ain't got much to be proud of.

i forgive your comment because i was able to quote Roast Beef in this.

Well, technically, if we're reading the comic backward, wouldn't Beef's comment come first? If you do that it, like me, makes incredible sense.

I was about to say this. Somebody should re-photoshop it with Beef's comment appearing above Ray's. Works a little too perfectly.. (shifty eyes dart about)

Somehow, Beef manages to make hold and sipping a beer into an anxious and shameful production. Marvelous.

*holding

You have to admit, it would make Strange Brew even better.

Impossible, Strange Brew is a brilliant piece of film making, donchaknow.

Strange Brew isn't a drink? Oh my god then what did i just give those orphan kids!?

And here I thought it was a boring Cream song.

OH MY GOD, LOOK WHAT'S INSIDE OF YOOOOOOU

yes.

Who?

On the other hand, The Who are completely boss.

Who isn't boring? ....oh, forget it.

Only the Boss is boss.

Ouch.

Funny. I always thought your avatar was sarcastic. Ginger Baker was pretty dope, but it's just not enough to make the rest of it OK with me.

I'm not a raving Clapton fan, but for some reason I have been representing myself online with this image for years. It's a mystery.

[img=http://img186.imageshack.us/img186/6460/cdcoverqr5.jpg]

oh, gotta love that Engrish..

[IMGS OFF]

please?

hurrah, it worked.

Mr. Crapton, your guitar.

I always thought it said "Clifton is GOD" which made me think of that Kool Keith lyric: "Clifton! Santiago, Keith Telavasquez, PSYCH!"

to rehash a tired, tired old drummer joke..

"What do Ginger baker and coffee have in common?"

"They both suck without cream"

Cue vaudeville piano to play me out..

I'm sorry..

HAH-chachacha

In my capacity as a member of the Society for the Ordination of Future American Gays (S.O.F.A.G), this comment has been heartily approved.

I...I'm not sure what is meant by that. Thanks?

You take that back! My black coffee is a Saint!

"We interrupt this broadcast to bring you this special message... How's it goin' eh? Todays movie on the Universal National Network is a classic. Starring in it, are two comedic geniuses of North American cinema from the 20th century, Bob and Doug McKenzie. Entitled "Strange Brew", it chronicles the heroic adventures of two latter day renaissance men, or, to use the correct 20th century terminology, hosers. We give it, 3 thumbs up."
-Deltron3030

chubby for the Del reference

What would?! Rick Moranis already pisses tons of beer out his dick in Strange Brew!

Ray is already trying to dress the part.

I'm from Canada, I know a lot about Ray.

eyelick

yeah, dope

Never before have I felt so proud to be Canadian.

Are you part of Achewood's Queblowmian constituency?

I cannot tell a lie: yes.

whut's it all aboot, motherfucker, eh?
and other stereotypes..

daaaaaaaaaaamn

Leave it to the professionals, son.

Hey I gotta get started somewhere.

I think you have a record number of chubbies, good sir.

Nope, he just has a very impressive number

I'm pretty sure the record for most chubbies is held by one of the many pictures of Salma Hayek's good tits. And it is just.

She did have pretty good tits.

Right now, good tits is edged out by Garfield's dog shit eyes 255-250.

For reference:
Good Tits
Garfield's eyes

But if you add the chubbies for Teodor's-face-on-Hayek's-tits, then Good Tits comes out way ahead.

Granted, many of the extra chubbies came from people voting twice on essentially the same graphic, but how many people would have given a second chubby to a variant of Garfield's Eyes?

Currently, it may be the highest-ranked non-Photoshopped post. And justifiably.

Until someone can make a picture of Salma Hayek's titties entirely out of 1's and 0's, it will be hard to beat with a text-only post.

Uhh.. I know this doesn't count at all, but you too can make selma hayek breasts out of 1's and 0's!

http://www.text-image.com/convert/

I used this picture and it worked out pretty well:

http://www.drunkhollywood.com/images/salam_hayek_cleavage_005.jpg

GOOOOOOOOOD TITS!

The following is for research purposes.

1111111111222222222233333333334444444444555555555566666666667777777777888888888899999999990000000000

Ah, FUCK! Stupid non monospace.

WHAT DID YOU DO

Yeah, that was my problem with it. I was thinking about screenshotting and hosting it. But i'd take the link down eventually and people would get pissy.

I am out of chubbies, sorry. Just tell folks to copy and paste it into a simple word processor, then select a monospaced font like Courier. Or tell them to fuck along on this auspicious day.

BAAAAAAAD TITS!

Why did assetbar throw up?

:-(

You guys are straight-up players

The only other one I can think of is my James Brown Bible, but I think that was 122. Is it moraist's and my Canadian mystique that makes it possible? In any case, I tip my hat to you, my Canadian brother.

Moraiat got ahead of rogergs, but how much of that is because the massive wave of newcomers have not seen url=http://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uuab9ZWCr#comment_14]this comment[/url]? Let's find out.

Let's try again:
this comment

Dang, looks like I'm third place. That's all right, I'm just happy to be in the picture somewhere.

In a certain computer sciencey sense that's what all of these images are made of, but that's nerd shit.

Perfect description of our country in rap form!

I would love to chubby this, but I hate breaking 69s. Someone else do it.

That is so awesome I'm sittin' here all "O Cana-WHAT? There's a new anthem up here!"

whats it with you Canadians and rap?

your rhymes are all so fresh

fresh and crisp like a Canadian spring.

Damn, I thought you were going to say "fresh and crisp like a Canadian beer."

Daaaaaammmmmnnn boooyeeee. Your flow be all too fresh, I...I don't think I can handle it right now.

i gotta go take stock.

The poster, Rachel, has clearly been served here.

You can now do the Charleston. That was Rad.

I lift a bowl of poutine to you, sir.

Or, if you don't live in whatever province eats poutine, I drunkenly spill syrup all over my hand as I prepare my waffles.

There, I managed to rope you all in there, didn't I.

The Arrogant Worms - Proud To Be Canadian

...yes i am a Yank and this song is still awesome. also this one.

I don't mean to be the sole negative voice, but I should point out that dental care is not covered under the Canada Health Act. Almost all dentistry in Canada is paid for privately -- and thus it is possible that we, Canadians, could still be tryin' to pull our teeth on window sills.

Rachel, how foolish you feel now!

Yeah! I speak for all of Canada when I say that Canada knows Ray just fine!

Ray: Not Into Canada.

He engaged me in some friendly ribbing about Canada when I wrote into Ray's Place asking if he thought a Kir Royale cocktail would be a good drink to mix for a lady houseguest. Maybe his opinion has slipped since that time.

In that same response he also nailed my people pretty thoroughly. We will indeed rassle to the death if someone looks at us the wrong way. Come on, Canadian, let's high-five for getting friendly-dissed by a cartoon cat!

What, you're too good to high-five me? THEMS' RASSLIN WORDS!

It's good to have priorities.

Ray Smuckles: Exceptionally good at taking notes? I would not have thought so.

Canadians on average masticate greater than the garden-variety slug.

They master-

oh you said masticate...

Masticate--which means to chew. So it still makes no sense.

Do you think a garden slug chews more often than an average canadian?

I think you mean mastur-

I noticed that right away. I blame the jazz cigarettes.

Your jazz cigarettes are laced with Drain-o, apparently.

Chubbied so hard for the alliterative smackdown of plying pompous pedantry.

Ha. My 'develope' post probably would have proved to avoid its pile of lames had I not previously posted this pedantic paragraph. Interestingly, it is infrequently that I insist on irritating users of incorrect grammar, and indeed that was not my intent there.

Humbly, I hope my harsh harangues can be swept aside so I may start with a spotless slate.

It's cool. I'm a closet pedant, myself. But that was a harsh personal attack. Unless you're drunk, that's not too cool. If you are drunk - carry on.

Dude just shut up.

Of course, good sir. Forgive my previous lame. You are forgiven.

no, the Internet is for Porn.

even Avenue Q says so.

gotta love them virtu-chubbies.

oh yea, that was lamed.

I didn't see it as a smack-down but just pomposity.

I think Ray would like Mounties if he'd just give them a chance. They seem up his alley.

Especially because it is a stranger.

Get Away From Me.

No, fuck you.

yes. as an australian. fuck you. canada has Whistler man. fuck you.

The last sentence came out more aggressive and less playful than I intended. Ah well. It's not like Australia doesn't get made fun of enough, as well. It's what living in a global community is all about. Yay! Happy time!

Wait, "I do like your breakfast foods" came out more aggressive than intended?

drskradley, you were once a reasonable man! Where is the incessant rocking motion I once knew and loved? You've changed.

I disagree, and would venture to say that as a whole, we have a better sense of humour than America. In fact, just like a stereotypical jewish comedian, we spend a lot of time making fun of ourselves.

My observation is not born from animus. I like Canada.

But it remains, if someone says "Blame Canada" and someone else follows up with another line from the song (my favorite is "They're not even a real country anyway") there will be shouts of umbrage and complaint 100% of the time from anxious Canadians.

To break my personal rule about referencing Achewood within Achewood to make a point, when Little Nephew releases an album titled Fuck. . . Algebra! there are no angry or defensive algebra teachers as a result.

A guy with a cat sausage avatar says it about Canada though, and oh maaaaaaan. C'mon, Canada. It's okay to be you. You're special.

Of course, contra my point this entire strip is about teasing Canada and everyone's been cool with that so you know, nevermind me.

Don't be saying "What's up with Canada?" if "never mind" is what you mean.

...if "never mind" is on your mind, then baby, just come clean.

You are not South Park, and you are not funny.

*hugs*

Exhibit B: That god-awful movie

Exhibit C: The people who think it is funny.

AKA the people who lamed this thread.

All's I'm sayin' is 'fuck canada'.

Ray is sporting hell of sass in regards to Canada.

On separate worlds?

Just to spite you.

The media scrutiny sure picks up when you're running for Master Chief. That's what the President is also called, right?

We're fucked, just enjoy the ride

Dude, if I were fucked I wouldn't be complaining. It's the stressed position, sleep deprivation, and waterboarding that get me down.

Ray had better be careful. He risks offending the bloc of voters who know about Canada.

From where else would Rick Moranis piss tons of beer

chubbied for the capitalization. imagining that dialogue in a conversation made me chortle.

Ray: paw on the pulse. Still surprised he hasn't been done in by the 'Blubbering Cat Dance' video on Drudge Report though.

Oh yeah, if Hillary got scrutinized for a tear and a half, that video could RUIN Ray's presidential bid.

Ray sent some men to have a certain relationship with Matt Drudge.

What kind of relationship?

What? Oh. A death relationship.

Ray is not too far off from the attitudes for the last four U. S. Presidents (Carter was pretty tight with Trudeau and could even identify six or seven of the provincial flags).

Has anyone else noticed that Ray has been CRAZY pissed-off since two panels ago, after being asked about newspaper solicitors? The man has some serious anger management issues. I bet it's because he's not wearing his medallion.

Remember what he did to that solicitor who came to his door? Cat hates paper like a ... like a cat hates paper.

Everyone noticed this.

why does ray gotta dis on my country so hard?

That's why I keep calling the capital of Canada Ottawapricot.

My brain stores canada in a vast lobe next to NoMeansNo, narduar, Strapping Young Lad, Voivod, Gorguts, D.O.A., Shotmaker, Dayglo Abortions, and Cryptopsy.

We had a golden age of metal here in the mid-'90s. Also look for Sacrifice and Disciples Of Power.

Rockin' Under Satan's House

Where is Manflesh.

Man, exactly. If memory serves me right, this stuck-up, arrogant and petty mannerisms of Citizen Ray would irk him to no end. You know, when I clicked the comic to be transported to the magical world of AssetBar, I was half expecting to see a well thought-out tirade against upper class snottism by the good ol' doctor. Now, I feel sort of empty. I guess disappointment is hard to cope with.

Manflesh is a douche. Maybe you're forgetting that last time he posted, it was 3,000 pictures of a dog. Not exactly "well thought out."

Now I get lamed.

Isn't that the point of myrrdisparo's comment? Isn't it like... sarcasm?

I find Manflesh amusing, but I can see how he is something of an acquired taste.

Actually, the last time he posted it was a short message about it being his birthday and fisting someone's sex hole.

So there.

I like that posting.

I also liked the 3000 pictures of the small dog.

But it doesn't matter, what I like--what's important is that it is ART, and ART is important.

Art is important.

what we need more of is Art.

what we need more of is art

art is important

Chubbied for not describing what anyone ever expects of Dr. Manflesh.

What can I say? I'm a classy guy.

Well this strip and these comments have told us one conclusive thing. Canada is apparently not pretend.

Much of the Canada-bashing is carried out by transplanted Canadians. See Canadian Bacon, in which all the stars are from Canada, if memory serves.

But Canadian Bacon was written and directed by Michael Moore. He is an American. And the stereotypes of Canada he uses aren't nearly as negative of the portrayal of the American administration. It's both Canada-bashing and America-bashing at once!

And John Candy was the only starring actor in that film who happens to be Canadian.

The best part about that John Candy played an American.

It's the turkey one.

Man, Strange Brew was an awesome movie.

Hey, Canada, let's compare the size of our GDPs.

Canada's GDP is bigger than Spain's (7) but smaller than Italy's (9). No matter how you work that, it is a raging Mediterranean stallion underneath the Polartec(TM) snowsuits and fetching baby-blue long underwear.

Oh shit I fucked up my numbers oh goodness oh no.

There's a reason I stuck to the humanities after high school.

So it's behind California?

Actually, I must have been looking at some hell of bad resources earlier, because upon further research I find that Canada's GDP is actually roughly equivalent to Mexico's and well below Italy and Spain's. Lesson: don't never trust wikipedia for nothing.

So yeah, well behind California's.

I have a job that does not require much of my time or my attention.

OK I think I was actually right both times. the CIA World Factbook has GDP (purchasing power parity) and GDP (official exchange rate). Countries rank way differently depending (let alone GDP per capita).

I had no idea.

I will never be cavalier when speaking of GDPs again.

You've been wrong before, but I like your decisveness.

Please tell me what I am supposed to think, clearly, and without preamble or explanation. Canada: Raging stallion, or humble farmer?

Humble farmer who has a pair of leather pants at the back of his closet behind all the flannel and plaid?

The question mark at the end killed it for me. It was your deciseveness that spoke to me. Now I see you as a flip-flopper.

I think this is a perfect description of Canada's economy.

I was wrong! Disregard the above! My blatant sexual ethno-stereotyping is rendered void!

I'm surprised that Beef seems to care so much about the frozen north.

P.S: Ray is almost right about the capital of Quebec.

Ray makes for a very angry politician.

Really?

Ray seems angrier than the situation warrants. But I guess Canada is that seemingly perfect neighbour who's so nice, but actually he is smug and passive-aggressive probably without even knowing it.

Although I disagree with most of Ray's statements I do have a theory that Canada is pretend. I mean it is a political and legal entity but it is not a nation in the emotive, symbolic, or spiritual sense. It is rather a loose conglomeration of 10-15 semi-formed nations (the only one to ever be legit is the former Dominion of Newfoundland 1855-1949. Suck on THAT, Quebec!)

Ray would have thrown me out of the house around 'semi-formed.'

Or rather, we want to secede because the rest of Canada thinks we are predominantly angst-ridden, faux-French, northernly displaced Cajuns. Thank you for justifying my political affiliation!

"I guess Canada is that seemingly perfect neighbour who's so nice, but actually he is smug and passive-aggressive probably without even knowing it."

So you're saying Canada is Ned Flanders... which would make the USA Homer Simpson.

Basically yes, except a Ned Flanders who is extremely liberal, what with his gay marriage and his lax marijuana laws. Vermont Ned Flanders.

I'm sorry that I called your country Homer Simpson.

Don't be sorry. We did re-elect W.

Who's "we?"

Hey, I didn't vote for him either. I was referring to the US as "we".

And I chubbied you for your technically correct punctuation, even though that convention has always annoyed me and I continue to put my closing punctuation mark outside of the quotes.

ever since this Issue was brought up here, i have begun to occasionally punctuate outside quotations in shorter things like "this", but "to me it makes sense to do it this way when quoting whole sentences."

How we feel about it matters not. We are bound by laws. We must abide them all, lest we descend into the hell of chat acronyms and emoticons for all eternity.

XD LOL!! U R 2 RITE!!

Hey, languages can die from being too strict & unchanging ('high' Latin) just as they can die from being too lax with rules (vulgar Latin!)

I stole the above from a shameful source. Or, "I shamefully stole the above." I'mma split my infinitives (and write "I'mma") no matter what The Man has to say about that.

this is True. i have read a Book about this. i can't remember the title...but i do know this Happens.

Seems like a sound theory to me. But I'll just be the guy who keeps doing it right. I'll do that for me.

Japan is getting ready to announce that they invented hockey.

Canada will always have curling, thankfully.

Didn't the Scottish invent curling?

My god, you're right. In my attempt at wit I snubbed the country of the Highlanders. The specter of William Wallace will appear at the foot of my bed and entreat me with a barbaric yawp:

"Ye may take our lives, but ye shall never take... our CURRRRLIIING!!!"

I shall rectify this grievance by purchasing single malts and fried Mars bars.

Well, they may have invented it but Canadians perfected it, so I guess it makes sense.

Ray would make a better President than Philippe, but only just.

Ray/Philippe '08. Beef is so tied to Ray he's kind of like First Dogg, so VP would be redundant.

Me and my running mate used to say that drowning in beer would be like heaven...

backstory: somebody earlier said that this works backwords as well as forwards, and that is true

here's a link to just the picture:

right here

Someone had also done it before you, up there.

god damn it

Sorry dogg. You did a good job, though.

...and, to be fair, yours looks much nicer (no dead white space). Still, if you were groping for chubbies (*chortle*), looks like you made a bit of a boner (*snigger* *cough*).

'twas merely a moment of self-indulgence, though i won't pretend i don't like the chubbies

also i never pass an opportunity to play around in photoshop

So! They laugh at my boner, will they?! I'll show them! I'LL SHOW THEM HOW MANY BONERS THE JOKER CAN MAKE!

I can hear Gob Bluth declaring this before he rides off on his segway...

Are you the mayor of Tiny Towne?

Being from Montreal, i found this fucking awesome.

Canada knows about you, Ray. Canada knows.

i think Ray lost his medallion.

Canadaaaa...Canadaaaaa
Canada is really sweet
Canada is filled with meat
We've been eating Canada!

Moose! Beaver! Snow! Hockey! Curling! Syrup! Scales! Fun!

Scales?

What he said.

You two need to watch more Mystery Science Theatre 3000.

Heh, our comments must've been mere seconds off. PSYCHIC LINK!

Wow...Gamera really IS full of meat. Looks like I owe Frank Coniff 50 bucks.

"And what's in here?"
"HIS GUTS!"


Sorry for butchering that,there don't seem to be any transcripts of that segment

Fuck me that is the greatest picture ever

i really miss KitH. remember the "Big Bucks" sketch? loved that one. LOVED that one.

30 Helens agree.

If President Smuckles makes it to the White House, the Canadians may burn it down. Again.

They did, you know.

I think Queblowme has potential as a fruit name.

surely he doesnt feel the same about europe

I found it odd that on the same day Ray shows disinterest in Canada, the Bank of Canada announced it was lowering its 2008 GDP estimate. It's almost as if Ray knew something about Canada that the Markets didn't and then they reacted to it. Spooky.

Ray's attitude towards Canada dissapoints me. Has he never seen a Hockey Fight? Has he never enjoyed the sweet sounds of Neil Young? I'm glad he has Beef there to set him right; Ray will be drinking Molson's soon enough.

I know he likes Neil Young's look. Or at least, half of it.

This comic perfectly represents the inner struggle felt by myself and all Canadians. So irrelevant, such a large GDP.

Ray is being a cock to a stranger. That stranger is Canada.

As a Canadian, I have no national pride due to the fact that America can slap us around and walk us around th park. We are, in essence, America's bitch. And I am no great fan of any of us asshole industrialized nations, especially when they kow-tow to the biggest asshole of them all. But I must say one thing: our beer is vastly superior to that watery swill you Americans call beer.

You're too hard on yourself (and your nationality). Most people I know (Americans, that is) have a fair amount of Canada envy, actually. All the comforts of a first-world country without having to think about the fact that the entire world hates you. Nice summers, and yes, better beer. Why worry what we think of you? So you've been a bit lacking in substantial cultural contributions. You gave the world The Kids In The Hall and Leonard Cohen. You've done your bit. Chin up, Canada!

Also Neil Young, Joni Mitchell, and Feist!

I dislike the Arcade Fire so they are not counting on my scorecard. Also, Canada has given the world Celine Dion and Shania Twain, which is like simultaneously shitting and pissing yourself in public.

SLOOOOOOAN

Triumph and Rush!

I likeD the Arcade Fire. Their first album was really really good. But the follow-up was just shockingly horrible. I was very disappointed.

I feel I should like them but I do not. Something about the lead singer. He sings every song exactly the same way. Like he can only ever express one emotion. Even Trent Reznor can handle 2 or 3, and he's made a career out of singing the same 5 or 6 songs.

Quote: More like pissing and shitting on the public. It doesn't necessarily have to be on yourself.

People say this, but really, the US produces tens of thousands of beers, and Canada probably produces hundreds or thousands. What you're really saying is that the Canadian beer you like is better than the crappy American beers that nobody you or I know drink. I think American macrobrews exist only to fund Superbowl commercials.

This is true, but I think that a country isn't necessarily thought about in terms of it's microbrews. Let's stay above the table, here. While some of those nice Milwaukee products often happily grace my gullet, I'd take a Moosehead over a High Life on at least five days of the week.

man, i'd take a coca-cola enema over a highlife seven days a week..

shame nations can't be defined by their microbrews, though: we'd have a "Malty, well rounded with hops and a hint of blackberries" sort of future..

High Life is tasty! I ain't got to defend that to you!

Yum, man!

(i do not drink. i just thought this fit in.)

I'll have to side with rowboat on this one. Though I usually drink the expensive stuff, you can't knock High Life.

I can, and do, knock Miller High Life. I imagine if I pissed in a bucket, added some yeast and barley, and fermented the mixture, it would probably taste better than Miller High Life. The label is an outright lie, it is not the champagne of beers. It is not even, as I have illustrated, the champagne of piss. If you want to get drunk on cheap beer, Pabst Blue Ribbon is the way to go.

I'm sorry, but this statement is just indefensible. "The Lady in the Moon" is a good cheap beer. PBR is a prank played on fraternity pledges and other people who don't know anything. I'm no snob about beer, but PBR is the only thing I won't drink.

(Personal aside: When I was a college man, I spent an absurd amount of time sucking down High Lifes at the greatest bar in the world -- Toddy's Backdoor Tavern in Knoxville, Tennessee. After I graduated. I moved away from Knoxville, and it was about two years before I made it back to the old watering hole. But this is why Toddy's is great: After that two-year layoff, I walked in the door, and just as I made it to the bar and planted myself on a stool, Catherine had a cold, crispy High Life open and waiting for me, before I ever even asked. God, I miss that place.)

I thought it was the champagne of beers simply because it's in a bottle shaped quite like a champagne bottle:

http://images.businessweek.com/ss/06/05/miller_products/image/miller.jpg

Miller High Life


Champagne bottle

Note: using URLs instead of pictures so I don't needlessly make this page even longer with big images.

Wait! You're all right! Except for the poor fool hating on High Life. I was going to quietly respect your opinion originally, but when you started in on the superiority of PBR I felt I had to step in. Don't get me wrong; I love the Ribbon just as much. Know why? 'Cause they're exactly the fucking same, dude! You're just critiquing the design of the bottle and the various cultural implications. In light of this, how many hot-ass witches does the label of PBR feature? I rest my case.

and here i sat, thinking PBR was only a Colorado thing...

Dude, no. High Life is terrible. It is TERRIBLE. High Life is what you give your kid when he asks for his first taste of beer, because you know it will keep him from asking again for a longass time. That is the only reason for High Life. It is basically a Punishment that a handful of people are inexplicably drinking on purpose of their own free will.

Miller High Life sponsored the Jackass movie. You know why? Because the only time anyone could ever drink High Life with an expression of relief on their faces would be after taking a bath in pig shit or getting stung on the junk by a scorpion.

Plenty of US microbrews give our microbrews a run for their money. But comparing Canadian macrobrews to US macrobrews is like comparing dog shit to slightly runnier dog shit.

True. But why argue about dog shit when, in the end, the whole beer world bows before a good Bass. I don't want to over-inflate too many limey heads, but the waste water on the floor of the most vile English brewery is sweeter than the best finished product of any other country in the world.

*shrug* We like to drink.

True as that is Czech/Polish lager or a good irish stout trounce the sceptered isle when it comes to a delectable beery beveredge.

As a Briton myself i know the last thing we need is inflated egos. for gods sake there are still w*nkers going on about the falklands war! (explanatory note: the falklands war was the war THAT SUCKED)

anyway Beer preference fight!

Oh Ye Gods That Be, I love me some Lech Premium.

Ahem. Crispy Stellas.

Enough said.

Belgium? Yeah - a close second.

Dude, the Brits totally kicked ass in the Falklands!* That was awesome, guys.

* - Sincere apologies to any Argentinians in the house. You guys did good, too.

Sigh, it's not about how much ass you kick, it's about why you are kicking it. That is what makes a war worth having.

Bass is good stuff. However, having spent most of the last ten years drinking progressively better beers, I can say without hesitation that there are dozens of better beers from the US West Coast. All of this is just personal preference, of course. I think that we should endeavor to drink only good beer, from as many different places as possible, as often as possible.

Fat Tire, Speakeasy, and Anchor Steam come to mind.

Bass is not representative of English beer, to the extent that it's fairly difficult to get Bass ale in a pub here. I've only ever drunk Bass in the US.

I did not know that. How about Newcastle? Is it also an imposter?

You mean New Castle Brown Ale? 'sfuckin' everywhere these days.

Thank the lord.

Are you kidding? Newcastle Brown is horrible. It comes below Guinness as an option in bad pubs.

That doesn't answer my question.

OK, Bass and Newcastle Brown are both brewed here. Whether your local supply is, that I cannot answer.

They are also both drank here. Newcastle Brown is moderately common, Bass less so. That said, I don't like Bass as much as I like Yuengling. That is a nice ale.

This is really funny. I like Bass, an English beer which is apparently rare in England, and you like Yuengling, an American beer which is definitely rare in America. The world is hilarious.

Fie on you. Not only is guiness delicious but it is also beautiful.

Guiness is a steak in a bottle and you sir are a COMMUNIST.

Your mother is a steak in a bottle.

Well shit, sorry for aping you down there; note to self: don't post something if you haven't refreshed the page in 2 hours.

Exportin' Tim Horton's is still the funniest thing on this page, by the way.

No need for an apology. It's flattery that we as Achewood fans think alike.

And thank you for the compliment on exportin' Tim Hortons. I overdid the internal rhyme a little, though. I might have to pay Rakim some royalty money.

I'd give you a chubby, but this is the first time I've ever had the 'run out of chubbies' thing. I agree with you totally on Radiohead...and this coming from a long-time listener of said band.

Chubbies all around for lukewarm Radiohead sentiments!