I just gave you your one hundredth chubby.

You're welcome.

Has Five been redefined?

I would give you a chubby except you have 5 chubbies and 5 lames, and I don't want to ruin it. PLEASE NO ONE RUIN THE BEAUTY.

It..It has been ruined...*sob*

Don't fret, balance has been restored.

Its stuff like this that makes the assetbar 100 times better then 4chan.

Only 100? More like one hundred hundreds of times better. Than again, any negative integer multiplied by a positive one is will always be negative. What I am saying is that 4chan has a negative value for being better or worse than basically anything.

Also someone lamed you, I assume it is for even mentioning that place. I cannot say I completely disagree with them.

more like over 9000 times

dag. you're right.

Well, just the one apartment building in Heaven.

you must be retarded.....

Why are you doing this

Why are you attacking a five year old child otter

WHAT MAKES YOUR HEART SO BLACK

I very much had to increase my lame threshold just to see this. I increased it to 50 and then was surprised when it still didn't show up. I am pleased with going to this much trouble because now I get to contribute the 78th lame. Yayyyyyy!

And with that, I ceremonially give your hundredth chubby. The circle is complete; you are officially the retard.

I mean your hundredth lame. I have fallen upon my own sword.

Hoisted with your own retard petard?

my friends printed this strip out for me on my birthday... it holds special significance forevermore.

what, No!
the christmas punch is the saddest thing.
http://m.assetbar.com/achewood/uuabrnRCw

this strip makes me feel conflicted. i can't help but laugh, but i can't help but think that ray and beef would've scarred any normal five year old for life... especially because beef was a hermaphrodite. too much weirdness, but i can't look away

"freaking hilarious"

also, "goddamned awesome"

That's the goddamned awesome.

I thank you for this new bit of vernacular, ford!

No, the best line is Ray asking Philippe if its okay to for Roast Beef to have a baby in Ray's room

This.

Roast Beef's face is priceless.

Oh man look at that compassion in the last panel.

considering phillipe is five, that gift hit the nail on the head. well played.

Who says good things never happen to the little shaver.

Male pregnancy is also a fetish.

Doug Winger.

Sometimes I think everything conceivable is a fetish if you google hard enough.

Siiiiigh.

Including hot Google pr0n.
Don't believe me, [url=www.google.com]Google[/url] it. C'mon, Google it hard... SO hard.

Yeah my high school content filter didn't cacth pr0n. Hilarious!

if I ever get married and have a kid it will only be on the condition that my wife describes birthing the child as "wacky."

You were not the favourite child.

^This is a rad comment.

For rest of today, I read comments in theeck Russian accent. PRAVDA!

This is the one that started it all for me.

I love Ray and Beef for doing this. Particularly the idea of how they came up with this as a way to surprise Phillipe.

Fuck yes.

I concur!

Philippe concurs angrily.

Also, sorry for the double post, but Beef's face while watching Philippe's contentment makes my heart go all gooey.

Beef's :3 face always warms my cockles.

My cockles are burning.

Kitten's got to have a collar, too, let's not forget that.

...

I'm sorry, I'll go take a cold shower now before I get further carried away.

If made to choose, I would take the collar over the ears.

But not over the butt plug with a tail attached to the end.

cats don't wear no butt plugs with tails. At least most cats don't...

his woman all gnawing on a dead bird in bed...

...goats?

A baby goat is called a kid.

I, too, would rather have kittens instead of kids. It's a bit weird, I'll grant you, but damn little kitties are cute. Babies - sorry all you mothers out there, but they're a bit boring.

Also, kittens are smaller.

And you can drop them and they'll be okay. Babies, not so much.

On the other hand, babies don't have claws...

But they have those tiny razor-like nails.

But babies don't learn to use the litterbox for well over a year. Net win goes to kittens.

I've used up my Chubby Allotment... So I will grant you one in essence only...

Kittens FTW.
Who the heck would want a screaming human maggot when they could have a cute little mewing fluffball instead?

the cake is a LIE

Off the top of my head? People who are allergic to cats.

Oh, yeah, and people who want to propogate the species. If I raise one smart kid it cancels out one dumb kid, and the world moves that much closer to balance.

Also, distinctly unlike human young, I have never seen a picture of a living kitten that was not intensely adorable. With the singular and notable exception of the one that was born with one big eye like a cyclops.

Oh God. That's the one.

Is that real? Does the eye work?
...
I want one.

It is real, it's like a very rare deformity where something has one eye in place of where it's nose should be. No idea if the eye actually worked or not.

Note my use of the past tense... It died like a day and a half after it was born. Like, outrageously tragic, right?

It does indeed fill me with an intense sadness.

It fills me with intense relief.

I meant the poor thing's entire truncated existence, not the fact that it died. I wouldn't want it to live for the sole purpose of being alive, so in that I freely agree with you.

AUGH
UNMAKE IT

Take it up with God.

Chubby for Cy the Cyclops Kitten. It's sad that it died a day and a half after it was born.

I bet Phillipe was a little disappointed that it wasn't a baby. A little.

The things they do for Philippe rock. I wish this happened to me on my birthday.

PS. Onstad rocks at drawing Philippe's innocent little emotions.

So would this be his 4th birthday? Or is it just assumed they are all his 5th?

PHILLIPE IS FIVE.

how is philippe retarded?

Oh god oh god your avatar is staring at me and asking that question... Um... You aren't. Every child marries flowers because a lying robot told them to.

*bursts into tears* I just couldn't do it, man...

Is SO good.
Is SO funny.

And with this strip in particular, is a male cat giving birth to a board game really that much more ridiculous than a giant rabbit sneaking into one's house and hiding (of all things) eggs and candy all about?

Maybe it is.
:shrug:

"he's havin' his baby in my room. Are you okay with that?"

I suspect hell of jays were burned in the preparation of this scheme.

I don't think Philippe ever realized it was a ruse.

Roast Beef yelling "OH GOD MAN THIS IS SO WAAAACKYYYYY" is probably my favorite panel in all of Achewood.

The hairnet is to prevent hairs infecting the memory machine.

Kermit is VERY PARTICULAR about this.

The birthday surprise is priceless.

I wonder why it wasn't Ray who got the giving birth gig. The gentleman clearly is packing hella cold pounds in the comparison to Roast Beef.

this is the best way to get gifts, ever.

This strip doesn't half tug on the heartstrings.

I get the sense that this charade was more for Ray's and Beef's benefit than Phillippe's.

I love this one so much I laugh so hard every time I re-read it

Oh I hope Philippe knows that men still cannot bear children from this experience... or presents.

I am doing this for a friend sometime.

,>BEST->BIRTHDAY->EVER-
| |
`-----<----------<------'

Philippe's Birthday is the day after mine! We should totally have a joint birthday party one time!