Vlad and Roast Beef's Window

Vlad and Roast Beef's Window 08/06/2003 « prev 1st rand curr next »

There is a good chance that I will hire a stripper to model future Achewood clothing

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Let's discuss the tapping of the left hand.

ocd, was my thought.

I can't even figure out what he means. Is he tapping his left hand with his right hand, or is he tapping his left hand against something else? I'm a long way from solving this mystery :(

This is actually a thing. I used to sit next to a guy at work who would tap the base of his palm twice agianst the front of the desk, and then tap the tips of his fingers twice behind the mouse before being able to touch the mouse itself. He had a number of other ticks and spasms, but this was the mouse related one. It was a constant ballet of movement in my periphery, but I never wanted to ask him about it in case it was a medical condition rather than just habit. I heard that he developed it his sophomore year of college, one semester he didn't twitch constantly, next semester he did.

When I was at the library, there was one dude who would click constantly, and I mean god damned constantly no matter what page he was at. It was like he was scared the page was going to slip away, much like a canvas being blown by the wind, and he has to keep clicking on it to keep it down.

FUCK it was impossible to study next to his ass.

That sounds like the kind of stuff I do without realizing it. It was maybe me. Sorry, dude.

Was he by any chance highlighting text? I used to do that with anything longer than a couple paragraphs. I still have no idea why. Killed quite a few good mice because of it.

But do you highlight and unhighlight at 23highlights/second? Twice I have seen people do this in my classes on their laptops while perusing their email or news-sites, all hell of A.D.D. I can just see the next generation being taught using blinking powerpoint presentations where the font and background colors switch off. All pupils darting up and down. All mouths foaming. All circle jerking the guy next to you getting hot to Heidegger.

You have the best avatar. it is known. go david mack. go go go. You don't know me. no you dont.

i have signed posters of his on my wall. just to add.

I do this.

daedala_x, do you think it is rad to have ocd?

I actually sort of do this, sure it's not 23highltights/second but, I do have a habit of highlighting text over and over again when I am reading it. Also, I tend to read text conversations out loud immediately after I finish typing them.

i totally do that on my laptop. the touchpad is fun. anyone reading over my shoulder is driven insane by my incessant highlighting.

I do that a lot. I like clicking.

I started to develop this habit for a while because if the window lost focus or you were focused on a text box within a page, the scroll wheel would not work properly.

But I taught myself to stop, because I kept accidentally clicking links, especially on pages that tag words but don't highlight them as links.

It sounds like obsessive behavior, it may stem from the procedure to neutralize static before working on a computer, though done to such an extent it is obviously more than is necessary.

You were worried that perhaps he had an allergy that prevented him from touching computer mice before he'd done a hand-tapping routine?
That's rad.

Did he ever hire the stripper? I want to know

I have noticed that the female models in the store are unreasonably sexy.

I wouldn't say it's unreasonable

If she isn't naked. It's unreasonable.

Ma'am, cease modeling that clothing. You are sexy and it is getting out of LINE.

Man, don't be lookin' in my-

Achewood makes me laugh out loud so often it's a wonder I didn't get fired from my last job.

Fantastic Vlad monologue.

Vlad would like to see something better when he looks into Roast Beef's windows, dammit.

Vlad spends the nights walking the sidewalks of the neighborhood, glancing in the windows he passes to see tableaus of other lives and other realities than his own. Vlad's driver's license is suspended.

Well, who wans spy on boring people? That's why ministers and royalty are always getting into trouble.

sometimes it's the quietest people.........

I love how practiced Vlad's speech sounds. The semicolon conveys that so well.

Vlad is a robot made up of many subroutines. In other words, he is a complicated robot.

He's got complicated subrouthines but one thing on his mind...

Vlad!

Boo to that!

How do you know that a robot's ass is bad?

IT MUST BE!

WHY FIND-

No, i can't. *sob*

It's in the liner notes to Rubber Soul.

Why find out

PS i felt my mouth dry up and crumble to dust at the thought of Beef's sandwich of choice

Interesting that he would bother to make that a sandwich, rather than just eating some bread and then some saltines.

Now try to whistle.

The sandwich was probably not all that dry since roast beef drew a :( onto each saltine with shiracha chili sauce before assembling and eating it.

Unless he applies the showercap to the keyboard itself I don't think it would do much good.

He might. I guess if it was a transparent cap you could still use the keyboard. This idea intrigues me.

Beef has been typing for most of his life. He does not need to see the keyboard to type miles and miles of code.

He doesn't need the shower cap for the keyboard; it's already covered by the Giant Condom.

Vlad: Wise friend to terrifyingly thorough voyeur in 20 seconds.

The second T says "..Vlad's here..." I knew everything was going to be OK.

I cannot get over the idea of the imaginary airport on arm of couch. It's just...it's funny in a very subtle way.

Yes. He is robot knowink exactly how human children create tableaux for playink. He should write advice column also.

Vlad watches you out of genuine concern for your wellbeing... with a sprig of awesome.

In one of our dining halls there's this guy who always double taps your id before he swipes it through the reader. He's a funny looking blond guy and he always smiles real big and wears dress shirts and weird ties and everyone calls him 'Happy Dave'.

Although I suppose I just revealed that I'm a college student.

A college student, eh? Now that you've narrowed the field, me and the rest of the internet will make with the identity theft. By this time tomorrow you'll be in Thailand making love to Bob Sapp to pay off your credit card debts.

Vlad you observant boy.

he probably still does that business

Beef can object all he wants but Vlad will NOT BE STOPPED

I think there needs to be a greater emphasis on the strippers who model! The idea is so ironicly great, music is coming out of my ears!

ugh. seriously. windows work both ways and i don't get why people look at you dirty for only using them in the other direction. i got mad curiosity! i have to solve it. like, if you don't want people to look, cover them or remove them. again; ugh. seriously.

the quietest people...

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