saint is that a picture of you?

What about Planet Piss? Ya'know (Murderfaces' solo project?). Phillipe would drink a planet sized piss. holla

or... pisssssssssssssssssss?

Eating and the combination of any strongly expressed emotion, is golden

hmmm would the piss of kings be truly golden, like gold metal gold, or golden like the golden color of people's piss only more golden. I'm thinking it must be metallic gold . . . it MUST BE

This is because Kings only drink that booze with gold flecks in it

aww yeah, classy as hell

Goldschläger

Enjoy, then.

wtf!?

What he's eating:
A banana


What he's crying about:
This damned banana

Maybe one day I can be your ex boyfriend. :D

I mean, we both like manatees.

...*hug*

yeah. who wants to hang around someone with a toe-biting cat?

Like Nemo waking up from a nightmare in every strip?

you sir, are INCORRECT

Obi-Wan forgives you.

Agreed. You can keep your om nom nom, I'll stick with my arble bargle and friends.

No doubt. Although Don Martin was on a whole other planet with onomatopoeia, it's not fair to compare him to anyone or anything.

one thing that never works is convincing them it is something they want to eat, like
kid "what IS this?"
me "it is ice cream/chocolate/plain cheese on bread"
kid "nuh unh" (thorws meal on floor)

never tried the magical/prehistorical angle though.

Apparently, my parents had to literally force me to try ice cream when I was little. (Guess what? I liked it!)

I love(d) dinosaurs when I was growing up, and my dad used to tell me that brocolli was little trees and also what dinosaurs ate.

One of my earliest memories is of my older sister telling me that I should eat my salad because it was "Brontosaurus Food."

I used to love cucumber slices, and when I ate them, my dad would pretend to be their little vegetable souls crying out for help. "No!" he'd say, "Don't eat me!!!" every single time I tried to take a bite.

I no longer eat cucumbers.

How many times was it stated that Philippe was 5?

If someone comes up to you in the street and tells you they're 5.... and then you meet them again 2 years later... are they still 5?

Only if they say they are.

Someone should get Philippe one of those badges with a big 5 on it... like I had when I was 5.

At Hobby Lobby, they sell ribbons that say "I can dress myself!"

I bought one when I was a sophomore in high school and gave it to my friend as a present. It was the Saddest Thing.

Anybody remember those Klaymation videos on newgrounds.com by Knox? Back in the day? In one a clay man tries to convince another clay man that they are brothers. He shows him a picture of their house from when they were little and it's a Hobby Lobby. I never knew it was an actual store and just died laughing everytime.

I know, hilarious.

I used to work at the Hobby Lobby warehouse. I detest, nay,loathe, Hobby Lobby now and refuse to shop there anymore.

I wouldn't shop at a place called Hobby Lobby. And here I thought hair salons had the corner on Bad Names (A Cut Above, BarberElla, etc)

We have one named Curl Up and Dye.

i see you also were an awesome toddler with many friends, as i was. they had to pry that fucking thing off me once i wasn't five no more. PRY.

They had to pry my 5 badge away as well... but that was because I kept trying to perform acupuncture on the other kids.

You consider a five-year-old a toddler? As far as I'm concerned, a toddler is three at the oldest.

hey, look who's being a dick about terms!

Or just being correct.

If they are Philippe then yes

I just think "IT'S NOT A TOOMAH"

This was the first strip I read, and it was indeed the alt text, combined with the furious look on Phillipe's face that got me hooked.

ARBLEGABBLEGOBBLEGREEBLEARBLEGABBLEGOBBLEGREEBLEARBLEGABBLEGOBBLEGREEBLEARBLEGABBLE OBBLEGREEBLE

ONE OF US! ONE OF US!

is it Friday already?

Damn. One more time:
[IMGS OFF]
My apologies, I'm kida new to commenting on here.

I give up, you all get the idea. I welcome the much deserved lames.

what in hell is wrong with you? you were victorious twice, but you still couldnt accept it...... do you have the depression? do you need a hug? how about a sammich?

Actually, I was thinking of a Sunday strip that used the same gag.

Also, does Assetbar still throw a shitfit if you claim that you've ever used meaningful ratings?

'streaming-tears' philippe is my highlight.

all

"getting yelled at while dying of starvation, APPARENTLY"

Ahh. Once the conventional wisdom, but lately refuted.

Philippe's furiously crying face cracks me up every time.

I love Téodor's deadpan humour.

I wonder which is preferable, starvation or diabetes?

from circumstances.

[IMGS OFF]

Am i the only one who imagines liebot talking like Mitch Hedburg?

not for me, I am guessing because I do not equate machines with marijuana

lie-bot's voice is going to have a lot more metal in it than mitch's

Not anymore.

For some reason, I can't help but hear LieBot's voice as sounding like Bugs Bunny. I think it's the gloves and (I don't know why) the glasses.

lie bot using his powers for good

This is, hands down, my favorite Achewood strip. The first time I read it was at work, when I was employed as a bank teller. I was laughing so hard I was crying (and I mean tears all just STREAMING down my face), all the while trying not to attract too much attention to myself.

Lie bot uses his powers for good!

'King piss' sounds like the name of a really cheap beer to me. The kind that you drink on Sunday morning, when it is still Saturday night and you don't give a damn what gets pumped down your throat, so long as it's not alive

Still Saturday night *for* you, anyway

says i gave out too many chubbies :-(
but i'm glad to hear that i'm not the only fuckin person who does this

There was a popcorn place I worked at which carried an ugly variety of ornange and green popcorn. It contained no distinct flavour, just overly sweet. We sold it to the kids as "Barney" popcorn, even after Barney had been taken from the air, and it was the first to sell. It just goes to show you can sell anything when choosing the right label for your demograph! In this case, we had to ensure the kids knew it was Dino eggs and Kings piss. Sold!

But... Barney is purple.

May have been their built-in sugar meters sensed the prescence of sweetness despite the name!

a business whose sole purpose is to sell popcorn? surely you jest.

Todd shoots someone.

So then the remaining vegetables on Phillipe's plate are edible tractors?

No, they're clumps of stuff that have fallen out of the treads of tractor tires.

My parents told me that baby potatoes were actually dinosaur eggs. I knew dinosaurs didn't exist anymore, but logic be damned! I still gobble greeble them

A time-honored technique observed by many parents

The fact of the matter is that more times than not, Lie Bot uses his powers for good.

I need an uncle or someone like Lie Bot

Great alt text or the greatest alt text?

From The Bartender's Handbook:

King Piss
3 oz. carrot juice
2 oz. red bull
2 oz. ketel one

Top 5 strip. Nothing can top the otter's furious eating.

I'm surprised more people didn't find humor in Lie Bot's implication that until recently we as a society believed that children liked getting yelled at while starving.

I can just picture Teodor's frustrated tone of voice, followed by Lie Bot's wistful sigh as he says "Ah, once the conventional wisdom, but lately refuted."

DC

P.S. This is my first Achewood comment ever. The magic begins now.

man this gag is from Calvin and Hobbes...

still funny though. and clearly Onstad is a Watterson fan, so it's a good tribute.

I remember that one!
Calvin's mom tells him that something is monkey brains and he gobbles it - but not furiously, if memory serves.

Yeah, but never KING PISS (and the strip was weaker for it!)

Oh my god I forgot about this one

EAT, DRINK KING PISS AND BE MERRY

Oh Philippe's expression in most of these panels are awesome! Also, wow... does King's piss have something magical for him to drink it quickly?

Finally Lie Bot once again using his powers for good.

so that's why my grandmother yelled at me and ate pizza pops in front of me and didn't give me any.
jesus lie bot, you always know exactly what to say.
♥

The best part of this is how shocked Lie Bot is.

Like, he knows it works, but he didn't it expect to go so far.

Wow, it's weird to see Philippe be bratty- he's usually so good! It must be confusing to be a parent

this is the best. no other

T in panel five is platinum.

Philippe straight up devours those eggs.
Mother Dino will not be pleased. Oh well, she's probably tomorrow's dinner anyway.

"King Piss", staring Rod Huggins, was perhaps the best work of the Softboy collaboration.