Coprophiliac Turkey

Coprophiliac Turkey 11/10/2004 « prev 1st rand curr next »

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not to be confused with coprophagiac

Yes, this turkey liked to have sex with feces, not eat them.

Man that turkey would taste bad

Actually many animals that subsist on excrement are considered delicious, strangely enough. Consider, for instance, the common Lobster, a shit-eating giant insect from the earth's festering asshole, which a man will pay $29 for without irony.

However, lobsters were originally sold ironically to rich people who lived far far away from the coast.

Prior to that there were laws passed to prevent prisons feeding inmates too much lobster as it was seen as cruel and unusual. Now, it's a commonly asked for last meal.

Indeed, the history of lobster richly illustrates the depths of human stupidity as this shit-obsessed hell-bug from Cthulhu's taint is sold to idiot inlanders who don't know better (following the invention of refrigeration). When these wealthy rubes develop a taste for shitbug, immediately it becomes high-class to eat this expensive horror from the deeps, and this status as 'rich people food' spreads back to the coasts, to those who should know better.

Now Lobster Ignorance covers most of the known world.

I wish I could chubby this far more than once for "shit-obsessed hell-bug from Cthulhu's taint".

farm turkeys(as well as chickens) do often consume their own excrement.

I was unaware that turkeys even came in these varieties!

Had to Google for Prince Albert. Wished I hadn't.

Yeah... I looked it up on Wikipedia and my only thought was "ow." And I'm not even a dude.

why did i do just what you did

whyyyyyyy

You people make me feel weird for already knowing this!!!

Don't worry, you're not the only one.

Want to get together and share knowledge of odd body piercings?

HAY EVERYONE LOOK UP THE PRINCESS ALBERTINA!

... You can probably guess, anyhow.

I refuse to even guess. Watch me not guess.

toolate

Is this so shocking? Didn't I learn what Harlequin-type Ichthyosis here? I took you all to be of stronger stock than this.

I'm not one of them.

Hey! Three more things to Google! Thanks Assetbar.

*hork*

That phrase will be on your tombstone.

I will see to this.

i saw everyone's warnings, and still i repeated your mistakes! went straight to wikipedia... typed it in... began to read the article... noticed the picture. the large, close-up, detailed picture.

Thank you, wikipedia. you make life grand.

I've got a PA and my pecker was pretty sore after I first got it. Actually getting it didn't really hurt so much. I mean there was a lot of blood at the time but it basically stung like getting an innoculation.

Bertie Wooster talking about having a Prince Albert is deeply disturbing, and man I can not imagine how that would not hurt while getting it, unless of course you had hella painkillers in your male member.

You meant hell of.

Like I said man, it was like getting a needle when it was actually done, and then it was sore.

i did not want to know this. but i refuse to un-know this.

chicks get their clits pierced. its approximately the same.

Agreed. First thought: "aaaawwwwwwaaaaaggggghhhhhh"
Or something to that effect. Also senseless terror, as if evil piercing gnomes might break into my home and force one on me now that I know it exists.

hehe. you haven't lived until you've been to the sort of festivals where dudes with these pass you on the road, all swingin around.

I would lame you but I'm too scared to.

Animated facial feature battle!

Everybody else here had to look up what a Prince Albert is. I knew about that, but had to look up coprophilia. I think my search dealt me the worse end of the deal.

We are in the same boat.

D:

is there room in there for one more? can we all huddle under a blanket?

I merely nodded knowingly at the alt-text and giggled at the concept of a turtle with such a piercing. I need under the blanket most of all. Is there a therapist amongst you perchance?

i knew both. please dont tell my mom.

Same 'ere. Let's keep it our secret mkay?

Do you... do you guys want to party?

I won't tell your moms if you won't tell mine.

I know both, because my mom told me.

Funny, your mother taught me both as well.

the obligitory "ssssip" in between frames.

I always thought that should be T-bone, and Onstad just never corrected the typo. Little did I know that prime rib normally includes the 6th through 12th ribs, or 7 bones. Onstad is the man with food on his mind.

Anyway, seven just makes sense for Ray. He's already had six bones.

How to know if you're too into Achewood: you don't have to follow that link. You know.

[Chubby #26 - don't mind if I do.]

Turkey Scat Porn, Genius.

Nah, turkeys usually avoid piercings. Turtles, on the other hand, are well-known as party animals. Why do you think Philippe wants to go as one for Halloween?

eating anything that believed in voodoo is asking for trouble.

I like that Ray and the perverted turkey salesman have been over the issue of craphumping turkeys before.

Mussolini had a Prince Albert and when he spoke he liked to use it and a hole in his pocket to gratify himself

More like Mussonanie

WHAAAAAAAAT.

Today's Blogs

Teodor: Chris did not move to Spain.
Philippe: Bad lunch.
Molly: Atkins driving me crazy
Onstad: Alton Brown has a "blog"!

Onstad is so offended by the concept of Atkins that two seperate characters have now derided it in their blogs.

Most ridiculous diet fad ever. Give me bulimia any day.

Ray's SSSIP pauses turn me on

What strikes me the most is Ray's reminder that coprophiliac animals have already been discussed on a previous occasion.

this. this is what almost, almost makes the strip a 5.

and then onstad brings up Prince Alberts. That is mega nasty. That is dog shit.

You got any anarchist lamb? Or maybe a bigamous trout?

!. Show me a monogamous one! (Trout is French slang for a prostitute.)

Just watch out for the anti-Semitic pigs.

Maybe an Alaskan whitefish that is Mormon, but kind of has doubts?

I had a weiner dog with a prince albert once.

I had a wiener dog with my Prince Albert once!

[Chester, please forgive me]

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