Hiram is the master of post syphillis apology letters.
zzzleepy » pro2 years ago
hee hee . . . ray has a homo-erotic digital fantasy
fuckyoufriday » neu2 years ago
Hey, if anyone calls him gay, he'll just sit there not being gay, and they'll be wrong.
rowboat » pro2 years ago
That line only works so many times. I'm getting skeptical. I'm not sayin' he doesn't dig on chicks, just that he may not be too particular one way or the other when the mood is right. Obviously, Hiram's smithy shop just had a certain ambiance.
tronwell » neu2 years ago
plus SO much coconut rum.
cpnglxynchos » neu2 years ago
Dad, this is Randy.
greenkoolayd » neu6 months ago
i wonder how well that goes with sheet cake.
charchar » neu2 years ago
The hammerblows (no pun inteneded...yet) ringing out like bells, Hiram all sweaty in the soft glow of the forges...
heatbag » neu2 years ago
Oregon Trail, you were the merciless pioneer life that killed all my childhood friends.
Now you are the emulation that kills all my adult friends.
brinkmanship » neu2 years ago
Merciless? even though syphilis was entirely absent from the original? Plus stranded desperate cannibalism, a major oversight.
Still, beats being eaten by a grue.
shirt145 » neu1 years ago
Damn you dysentery! Damn your cold heart to heck! Ah well... I just wanted to shoot squirrels anyway.
suprememongoose » pro2 years ago
The thing I hated about that game was that they made us play it even though we already lived in Oregon
somanywhales » neu2 years ago
dude that makes this game your heritage
suprememongoose » neu2 years ago
Thinking back on the contents of said game, I'm not sure how I feel about that. *considers this new angle*
closefriend » pro2 years ago
To be fair, I never could get all the way to Oregon.
relaxing » neu2 years ago
Man, you missed out on the best part of the game!
luckypyjamas » pro2 years ago
all going down that river
all dodging rocks in the water
macdaddyw » neu2 years ago
I got to it twice. When you did, you were the hero of the class. You had to hurry up and half ass your homework just so you had enough time to devote to that game. God I loved that game.
jthm_guitarist » pro2 years ago
I know what you mean man!
In my class though, we only spent like a few days on the game.
slab64 » pro2 years ago
Reminds me of the way my homeboys and I used to play PC games back in small times, in the olden days before multiplayer. One dude navigates, everyone else spectates.
speedwell » pro2 years ago
division of labor: one kid with point click prowess and another diligently manning home row and down goes diablo
zeal » neu2 years ago
Earthsiege 2. Flying Herc. He shoots, I control the engines.
soticoto » neu2 years ago
We weren't allowed to use mathematical equipment when we played Scorched Earth matches on the DOS, but that didn't stop my comrades using my Autistic powers of angle-deduction to guarantee the win.
... I wasn't allowed to play it myself though.
achilleselbow » neu2 years ago
Yea but come on, you don't really need help for that. If you're talking about the first one, my Rogue's dexterity was so high at that point that Diablo just stood there recoiling as I pumped arrows into him. Pretty anti-climactic.
jollysaintpete » neu1 years ago
On Hardcore mode? I have got my doubts
jollysaintpete » neu1 years ago
BRILLIANT
belgand » neu1 years ago
Yeah. How come nobody plays games that way anymore? Is nobody interested in new games? Man, I could never get my friends to come over and play games and put up with that shit at all.
skiddyfisk » pro2 years ago
I remember growing up in Oregon playing that on the school's one computer in 1996 and thinking "cool, we're in a video game"
jesler729 » neu2 years ago
>:[
xi » neu2 years ago
I really can't see how you'd call it "hellish". I mean... I have you been to Alaska?
audhumla » pro2 years ago
i am in corvallis
catgrl131 » neu1 years ago
Seriously, who the hell goes to Cornwallis?
lux » neu1 years ago
I know!
bossadelic » neu1 years ago
seriously!
zapatos » neu1 years ago
Hell: fire brimstone and death
fuckin... NM AZ NV anyone?
libelandslander » neu1 years ago
Sorry, I lamed you before I noticed that you live in Cowvallis.
Condolences, dude, but Portland is not that far of a drive.
neoboman » pro2 years ago
There's no better word to describe the game Oregon Trail than "decent"
scramblesthedog » pro2 years ago
The look on Ray's face in the last three panels is a perfect bit of cartooning.
philosophe » pro2 years ago
I remember back in small times I played Oregon Trail and named my party Mom, Dad, etc. Then when the game told me "Mom died of dysentery" I cried. This happened a couple of times.
charchar » neu2 years ago
I would name my characters after kids from class, and feed them jimsonweed if they'd pissed me off. "Your whole party has contracted dysentery..."
odei » neu2 years ago
Phillipe, Phillipe, Phillipe.
tttt » neu2 years ago
game is mad decent.
pitseleh » pro2 years ago
Whatever you do, don't attempt to ford the fucking river, man. It always ends badly.
[IMGS OFF]
heyoo » neu2 years ago
I played the game on the internet and literally everyone died when I attempted to float my wagon across the river. It was so sad when both "Asshole" and "Faggy" died.
apocowarg » pro2 years ago
I forded that bitch ALL the time.
layzerblade » neu7 months ago
When it's shallow enough to ford, it's actually less safe to caulk.
deusoma » pro2 years ago
It's the "He wrote!" that does it for me.
snowman » neu2 years ago
Sorry, that was dick.
j03y » pro2 years ago
did syphillis even come to america at that time???
professoryes » neu2 years ago
If it did, it came through Hiram.
belgand » neu1 years ago
That is true. It was indeed because Hiram did come quite a lot.
trollcollins » neu1 years ago
Yes. Well before that time. Blame sailors and prostitutes!
spinynorman » neu1 years ago
Frenchified!
layzerblade » neu7 months ago
Many actually trace syphilis to the New World, one of comparably few diseases that made it from America to Europe instead of the other way around.
luckypyjamas » pro2 years ago
also, this comic is titled "oregon tail"
i just thought i'd point that out
mattylite » pro2 years ago
Chubbied for making my brain stop filling in the "r" automatically. I would have had no idea.
i_love_kate » neu1 years ago
I assumed it was a pun on the game's name... and, y'know... sex.
luckypyjamas » neu1 years ago
i didn't think about it as a pun on sex
but
okay
yeah
cameasiam » pro2 years ago
the alt text makes this a 6.
robstrong » pro2 years ago
I believe the past tense of the verb "to shoe" is "shod".
caseyb3 » neu2 years ago
Fun fact: There are actually four (five?) numbered versions of the Oregon Trail now, along with the many many many 'minor' upgrades.
Oregon Trail II is a serious player, in spite of the somewhat silly FMV stuff.
rbisme » pro2 years ago
so juicy
snowman » neu2 years ago
I love this one because it's such a good stand-alone strip. Anyone could read this, regardless of story arc context, and it's just really concise and funny.
mikeronomicon » neu1 years ago
I just learned that they made a new 3d version of this. I must play it to see if it has smallpox-laden blankets and syphilis.
genequagmire » pro1 years ago
This would be the best remake ever.
greenkoolayd » neu6 months ago
how do you pronounce "oregon"? ORE-eh-gehn or organ?
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Now you are the emulation that kills all my adult friends.
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Still, beats being eaten by a grue.
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all dodging rocks in the water
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In my class though, we only spent like a few days on the game.
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... I wasn't allowed to play it myself though.
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(marked lame by entropyends, djwhiterabbit, Jesler729, Connellingus, DougTheHead, lateadopter, joebot)
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(marked lame by stormypinkness, Jesler729, captneko, libelandslander)
(marked lame by MilesDonovan, erributtz, mattylite)
(marked lame by lux, logic, tropicana)
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fuckin... NM AZ NV anyone?
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Condolences, dude, but Portland is not that far of a drive.
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[IMGS OFF]
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(marked lame by fattypneumonia, smilebuddha, Audhumla)
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i just thought i'd point that out
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but
okay
yeah
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Oregon Trail II is a serious player, in spite of the somewhat silly FMV stuff.
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